It may be a lovers' quarrel, but victory isn't declared when one of you staggers back to the bedroom, clutching your wounded heart in your hands."People often fixate on who's right, which distracts them from finding a solution," says Karney. "Conflicts are resolved quickly and more successfully when neither party feels compelled to proclaim, 'See that? I'm right!' "
For starters, find something you both can agree on (even if it means admitting that, OK, maybe you do send him a few too many texts while he's out with his friends). Then focus on finding a happy medium.
For example, say, "I know it annoys you when I bombard you with text messages, but I get worried when you take forever to reply. Let's find a way to handle this so that we're both comfortable." This way, there's much less toddlerlike head butting.
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