How to get her to commit

get her to commitThe challenge is to share your feelings in a way that will help you get what you want and won’t make you seem like you’re groveling and/or desperate. Here are some tips to keep in mind.

Bring it up casually
Given that overboard gestures might make a woman uncomfortable, consider doing what most men do best anyway: asking in a more laid-back manner. Make sure the venue in which you’re asking is mellow as well — no fancy dinners, no propositions in front of family, and so on. Remember: You want to be in the kind of circumstances where her saying “no” won’t leave you feeling like a dolt for an extended period of time. “I think while you’re walking her home or driving her home is good,” says Eric. “That way you’re not stuck at some restaurant with this giant rejection hanging over you if she says no.”

Never just assume you’re exclusive
This should seem obvious, but guys can still be presumptuous and make all kinds of embarrassing mistakes. “I was seeing this girl and I changed my Facebook profile to say ‘In a Relationship,’” admits PJ. “And she was like, ‘Who are you in a relationship with?’ I was like, ‘You!’ I could tell she wasn’t exactly happy about it.”

Make sure there’s a good chance she’ll say yes
The conventional wisdom is that women are always ready to have a boyfriend. And maybe that was true during the Eisenhower administration. But in the present day of Facebook and the near limitless possibilities of online dating, it is just as likely a woman wants to have what is euphemistically known as “having fun.” “Be really careful if she’s just finished a long-term relationship,” says James, a chef. “Or if she doesn’t return your phone calls right away. If your calls are going right to voicemail, and she doesn’t call you back for like eight hours, she doesn’t want you to be her boyfriend.”

Don’t go overboard
The guiding principle in asking a girl to be your girlfriend is to not appear desperate: No matter how good your intentions, you may never recover from it. “My boyfriend bought me a necklace and literally got on his knees and asked me to be his girlfriend,” says Shelia, a web designer. “I said ‘yes,’ but it was a little much.” Even less dramatic overtures can still feel over the top.

“I was at dinner with this girl, and I took her hand and said ‘You know I’m not seeing anyone else,’” says Zach, a lawyer. “I thought we’d have this romantic moment, but she just looked at me like I was crazy.”

Conclusion: You have to get her to say “yes” to the idea of dating exclusively before you are in fact dating exclusively.

Anda Tidak Ingin Menikah Dengan Pria yang Salah

Penulis di Inggris yang gagal dengan pernikahan pertamanya, Claire Lindsey, mengatakan, "Jika saja saya bisa memberikan nasihat kepada calon pengantin perempuan atau laki-laki, yang berpikir bahwa mereka merasa melakukan kesalahan dengan menikah, dengarkanlah tanda-tanda ini. Jangan pernah mengabaikan tanda peringatan seperti ini," katanya kepada Daily Mail.

Untuk mengenali apakah Anda menikahi pria yang salah, berikut tandanya:

1. Anda tidak tertarik dengannya
Ketertarikan fisik penting. Jika Anda tak berhasrat melepaskan bajunya, tandanya Anda tak menginginkannya.

2. Anda lebih superior darinya
Kalau pekerjaan Anda atau level pendidikan Anda lebih tinggi dari pasangan, ini bukan jadi masalah besar. Namun, ketika Anda merasa malu atas diri pasangan, dan Anda merasa tak nyaman karenanya, jangan pernah menikahinya.

3. Si dia bikin Anda tak nyaman
Sikap pasangan yang membuat Anda merasa tak nyaman adalah salah satu petanda. Ketika si dia membuat Anda merasa tidak menarik dibandingkan dengan perempuan lain di sekitar Anda, pikirkan lagi untuk menikahinya.

4. Nilai dan persepsi bertolak belakang
Bagaimana nilai yang dianut dan persepsi pasangan tentang berbagai hal memengaruhi hubungan. Jika si dia menjunjung nilai bahwa Anda, sebagai perempuan, tak harus berpendidikan tinggi, tak boleh beraktivitas luar ruang, coba pikirkan lagi. Apakah Anda bisa bertahan dalam hubungan pernikahan dengan pasangan yang memiliki nilai seperti ini.

5. Si dia terlalu berkuasa
Jika pasangan termasuk tipe pengontrol, pikirkan lagi apakah Anda mau benar-benar menikahinya. Anda tentu tak nyaman ketika semua kegiatan Anda harus atas seizinnya. Atau Anda wajib mengikuti perintahnya untuk menjalankan apa pun aktivitas dan rutinitas sehari-hari.

6. Tak mau berkomunikasi
Komunikasi merupakan kunci keberhasilan hubungan pernikahan. Coba kenali, jika saat ini pasangan Anda tak terbiasa berbicara, berbagi cerita, berkomunikasi, mungkin suatu saat ia akan berubah. Namun, jika Anda melihat si dia tak mau berubah dan enggan berkomunikasi dengan Anda, sebaiknya pikir ulang rencana pernikahan. Menikahlah dengan pria yang suka berkomunikasi, maka Anda takkan pernah menyesal.

7. Tak mampu bersikap humoris
Saat pasangan bisa menjalani masa susah dan senang bersama, hubungan pernikahan akan berjalan lancar, termasuk ketika pasangan menikah bisa sama-sama tertawa meski sedang susah. Kebersamaan inilah yang dibutuhkan pasangan menikah agar langgeng. Jika pasangan Anda terlalu serius dan tak bisa mencairkan suasana, pikirkan kembali mengenai rencana pernikahan.

8. Si dia berbohong
Kebiasaan berbohong menjadi petanda bahwa si dia bukan pasangan yang tepat untuk Anda. Pasangan yang berbohong menjadi salah satu petanda bahwa ia bukan pria yang tepat untuk dinikahi.

9. Keluarga Anda tak menyukai
Hubungan Anda dan si dia memang personal. Namun, penilaian keluarga atau orang terdekat juga penting. Jika orangtua Anda atau orang lain melihat ada yang salah dengan pasangan Anda, cobalah pertimbangkan kembali. Boleh jadi penilaian orang lain lebih obyektif.


Bad relationship habits to dump

Bad relationship habitsMarty Friedman, author of Straight Talk for Men About Marriage, talks about how to recognize — and get rid of — these bad habits so your love life can prosper.

Bad Habit #1: Never ending your arguments. One of the dubious perks of being married, Friedman says, is being able to “stomp out of the room, cool yourself down, and bring up the issue again a few days or weeks later — or let it fester forever.” W

Bad Habit #2: Letting yourself go. When two people are married for a long time, they stop trying to impress each other. “It’s easy to say, ‘I just want someone who likes me for who I am,’ but truthfully, the way humans operate is to feel more comfortable with and attracted to someone who cares enough about appearance to look presentable.”

Bad Habit #3: Under-communicating your needs. Most married couples have the ability to read each other’s minds but still you need to state your needs and feelings out loud, in a responsible way. Friedman says. “The good news is, by speaking up you can help shape how your new partner treats you.”

Bad Habit #4: Sniping instead of talking. Instead of criticizing your partner, you should make an effort to “request what you need in a specific, caring way. For example: instead of shouting ‘You’re always late for everything,’ you can say gently, ‘This Saturday night, it would really mean a lot to me if you showed up on time or even a few minutes early.’”

Bad Habit #5: Not saying “thank you.” You should start your new relationship on a solid foundation of gratitude and appreciation, right from the beginning,” Friedman says. “Be thankful for the little things... even the fact that this person is spending the evening with you.” And while you’re at it, go head — say it out loud.


Most Common Reasons that Keep You from Settling Down

Keep You from Settling DownFor many of us, falling in love — and deciding that yes, this time it’s meant to last forever — is not as easy as it seems. So, what keeps so many seemingly smart men and women from deciding that the person they’re with is The One?

1. Your list of “must-haves” for a romantic partner is unattainable
One of the biggest sticking points for people, says counseling psychologist Dr. Linda Young, is having a long list of characteristics that are considered essential for both a partner and the relationship. This lengthy list of essentials can be self-defeating, since it’s unlikely you’ll meet anyone who meets every requirement on that list.

2. You’re unwilling to compromise in relationships
Many of us don’t focus hard enough (or long enough) on what makes a relationship truly satisfying and sustainable over a lifetime. Being more forgiving of a partner’s faults or more flexible about another person’s annoying habits may be difficult, but the ability to compromise matters. Instead, many of us are looking to wherever the grass appears to be greener.

3. You’re afraid of intimacy
The other challenge for many may be in letting another person in. After spending much of our 20s and early 30s building a career, honoring the idea that it’s important to be successful and dating with the knowledge that most relationships will end, we build up a defense mechanism. When we finally decide we do want to settle down, we have to take down the walls we’ve built up. “One of the ways we protect ourselves is to learn how to not go all in, and then when you want to get married you have to figure out how to go all in,” says Young.

4. You pick partners that share your interests, but not your values and goals
Young admits she’s fascinated by online dating profiles, where many people list “important traits” that are actually things they themselves prefer to do: “Must like hiking. Must enjoy ska music. Must love long walks on the beach at sunset.” Young points out that “those things are not very important when it comes down to a long-term, satisfying relationship. The really important stuff is how your basic character traits and personality features complement each other, and where you are similar on the things that matter most to you. You really need to know what your values are before you can know if someone else shares them.”

5. You believe there’s only one soul mate out there waiting for you
“I think some people still have this fantasy notion that there’s going to be just one Mr. or Ms. Right. So when they have someone they’ve been with who displays many of these characteristics and they get along just fine together, these daters still think, ‘well, it doesn’t feel magical, like having a soul mate is supposed to feel’,” says Young. “It’s not always going to feel that way.”

Tips Untuk Si Pemalu dalam Percintaan

Si PemaluJika Anda termasuk wanita pemalu, ada beberapa kiat yang bisa dilakukan untuk menjadikan Anda lebih percaya diri.

Berdiri Tegak
Tarik otot perut ke dalam saat Anda berdiri, sehingga dada terlihat membusung dan punggung tegak. Sikap tubuh seperti ini akan membuat Anda terlihat percaya diri. Sering-seringlah berlatih di depan kaca sampai posisi berdiri Anda tampak natural.

Jangan Menyilangkan Tangan
Cara berpose memperlihatkan kepribadian seseorang. Menyilangkan tangan saat duduk atau berbicara menandakan Anda orang yang defensif dan pemalu. Biasakanlah untuk menghindari sikap ini untuk meningkatkan kepcercayaan diri.

Lakukan Kontak Mata
Saat bertemu orang, pandang lurus ke lawan bicara dan fokuskan pada mata dan wajahnya. Tapi jangan terkesan bahwa Anda sedang membelalakkan mata. Tatap dengan mata yang ramah dan bersahabat.

Buatlah Gerakan Pertama
Berdirilah di dekat orang yang ingin Anda ajak bicara untuk memulai percakapan. Tatap matanya dan beri sedikit senyum. Jika dia membalas senyuman dan langsung menatap Anda, itu tandanya dia tidak keberatan diajak bicara.

Beri Pujian
Jika tak punya ide memulai obrolan, sebuah pujian mungkin bisa jadi solusinya. Namun jangan memuji terlalu berlebihan, beri pujian secara jujur berdasarkan apa yang ada di benak Anda.


What Internet Sex Study Reveals

Internet sexScientists have finally got a grip on our deepest sexual desires - by looking at what people type into online search. They have examined one billion online sex-related searches from around the world to find out what users click on when no one else is looking.

The findings have been published in a book called A Billion Wicked Thoughts, co-authored by Ogi Ogas and Sai Gaddam. The pair hope it will prove there is no such thing as sexual deviance as almost nothing is seen as out of bounds.

The survey is so vast it is viewed by many experts as the most complete analysis of human sexual desires. Among the findings are the fact straight men prefer heavier women to thinner ones and find feet erotic.

They also enjoy a wide variety of erotic images, including bizarrely both elderly women and transsexuals. Meanwhile straight women enjoy reading about and watching romances between two men, but only when the focus is on emotion and not sex.

Gay men and straight men were found to have the same favourite body parts, which in order are chests, buttocks then feet. Surprisingly, search engine results from Dogpile, which provided the search data from Google, Yahoo! and Bing, said almost 80 per cent of internet searches were made up of 20 interests, ranging from youth, to cheerleaders.


Online Game and Relationship

These days, there are so many online games available in the internet and they're easy to download and play. Couples love to spend their time together playing online games, they are almost weather proof, no queuing, no traffic jam, most of them are free and couples can even make extra money from playing online games. These days, we can find huge selections of online games, free slots is one of the popular games that people love to play. Whatever the game you pick, make sure you are enjoying it while playing.

When you and your loved one feel bored with your routine works, besides reading, one type of hobbies then online game is one choice which many times becoming a great companion for those who are in above condition. Love birds can play from strategic games to online casinos, from mind exercising games to educational games. With so many bonus rating website available these days, it won’t be difficult to find no deposit bonus codes casino, this one is for couples who love to play this type of game. There is always a rating website for each type of online game in the internet.

Online game is easy to enjoy, what you need is simply a computer, internet connection, and then you can start playing. If you need to buy a game or pay some fee, you can use paypal or credit card. Those who play casinos, paypal casinos are other options for payment. Online games fit couples who have a busy lifestyle, those who have not much time for doing pleasure activities together. Couples, who love to do their activities together, have been proven to have a more stable relationship. It is never too late to start anything that can make your relationship last longer, so anytime you both are available, play some online games that excite you both.